Blaine Anderson vs The World
by ilvecoffee-n-narutoYOUTH
Summary: Klaine. It's a simple love story. Boy meets boy. Boy falls for boy. Boy must defeat seven evil exes-Wait, what! Well, all's fair in love and war. Scott Pilgrim Crossover.
1. Prologue: The Stranger from New York

Blaine Anderson vs. the World

Chapter 1: The Stranger from NY

Blaine moaned loudly and thrashed in his bed as he felt his blanket being torn off him.

"Blaine!" His roommate, Sebastian, said loudly. "Any other time I'd _love _to see you

writhing beneath me and moaning in ecstasy, but that behemoth you call a drummer has been calling you for the past hour."

"Why couldn't you have answered it" Blaine mumbled and buried his head into his

pillow.

"Because I didn't want to. Now get up," He crawled onto Blaine's bed despite the other boy trying to push him away and leaned in close to his ear. "Or I'll have to do…_stuff _to you." He licked Blaine's face. Blaine rolled off the bed and hit the floor as Sebastian laughed and his own pissed-off-meter began to glow a dangerous red above his head.

"That's disgusting, Sebastian! I don't know where you're tongue's been!" He furiously wiped at his soiled cheek.

"Nowhere yours hasn't." Sebastian winked at him and Blaine blushed and stomped out the room where he immediately heard the strains of 'Losing My Religion', Finn's personal ring tone. He trudged into the kitchen and picked it up from where he'd thrown it on the counter last night.

"What!" Blaine snapped.

"Dude, calm down! What'd I do?" Blaine rolled his eyes as Finn's stupid voice. It was too early in the morning to deal with this.

"What do you want Finn."

"I need you to take me to the airport." Finn sounded annoyingly excited at the prospect of going somewhere as out of the way as the airport.

"It's like an hour away! What do you need to go to the airport for?"

"My brother's back in town from NYC and I need to go get him."

"Why can't you get him yourself?" Blaine asked as he went into his room and picked up a discarded pair of pants and slipped them on, resigned to the fact that he was going to have to take Finn.

"Well…I kinda spent my check on a new pair of drumsticks, but in my defense," He

hurriedly added. "They're gonna totally give me level up powers during a rock off. But I don't have money for gas now." He admitted sheepishly and laughed. Blaine sighed and shook his head at Finn's stupidity.

"I'm on my way." He grabbed his sweater off the swivel chair that sat at his desk.

"Kay, thanks. You're awesome, bro. bye."

"Bye…bitch." Blaine mumbled then pressed end and slid his phone into his pocket. He grabbed his keys off the stand next to his bed and headed towards the door, where his shoes were kicked off in haste last night.

"Sebastian, I'm leaving!" Blaine yelled while putting on his shoes. Sebastian then

appeared in the hallway and leaned against the wall, completely naked except for a long, black censor box covering his nether region.

"God Sebastian, what is _**WRONG **_with you!" He yelled, immediately covering his eyes.

"Calm down Blaine. You're pissed-off-meter's about to burst." He could hear the

chuckle in his voice.

"There's seriously something wrong with you. God! How did you even do that?" He

gestured one hand towards the box.

"You know, I'm not entirely sure. But it's cool, right?" He shimmied his hips making the box swing from side to side. "And besides, the clothes are coming off at some point tonight. Why beat around the bush. It's much simpler this way."

"Whatever, I'm leaving." Blaine turned to go but Sebastian grabbed his shoulder, which Blaine immediately jerked away from with a mumbled 'don't know where your hands have been'.

"I need you to get some Tequila on your way to wherever. And not that cheap stuff

either. I've got a potential lay coming over and he really likes his drink."

Blaine opened his mouth to say something but thought better. "I've really got to get a new roommate." Blaine mumbled and then left.

***A Fine Romance***

Fifteen minutes later, Blaine pulled in front of Finn's house and honked three times. Finn ran out the door, pulling on his jacket frantically.

"Hey man." Finn plopped into the passenger seat and smiled again. "Thanks again,

seriously dude. I owe you one—_Woah_!" He yelled, eyes on Blaine's ever increasing pissed-off-meter that was dangerously reaching black. "What's wrong, dude?"

Blaine mumbled something unintelligible and took off towards the highway that would lead them to Port Columbus.

"Since when do you have a brother?" Blaine asked suddenly. He raked his brain, trying to remember Finn ever mentioning anything about a brother, but he couldn't come up with anything.

"Well, stepbrother actually. Our parents got married when I had just graduated high

school."

Blaine glanced at Finn, bemused. "That doesn't explain why you've never mentioned him."

Finn sighed and scratched his head. "He was four years younger than me, so we never really got to talk much, and then there was the Basement Thing and the Rachel Thing—"

"Rachel, your girlfriend, Rachel?"

"Yeah." Finn nodded.

"What happened?"

"Uh…it was stupid. It doesn't matter now. Anyway," Finn said blushing, clearly

changing the subject. "Kurt ended up graduating early, I think he was like, 16 or something, and he got accepted to NYU, and now three years later without any contact from him, he's decided he wants to 'strengthen our family bonds'."

Blaine nodded, processing the information. To him this Kurt fellow sounded completely fucking _insane_, which he told Finn.

"Like I said, I don't really know him, so he might be. But I heard from Burt, his dad," he added for Blaine's benefit. "That he was having a pretty rough time in NY, so I wanna at least give him a chance."

After that the ride passed in silence, save for the radio which Finn had turned on halfway through the ride. When they finally arrived at the airport, instead of circling, like Finn repeatedly demanded they do, Blaine parked and decided that they'd wait at the baggage claim.

"Do you even know what he looks like?" Blaine asked, exasperated, as he watched

people mill about.

"Yeah. I mean, he _is _my brother, dude. He said he's wearing a green scarf."

Blaine nodded and they waited for about five more minutes when Fin suddenly

yelled, "That's him!" He jumped up and tan towards something Blaine couldn't see.

"Finn, wait! Where are you going?" He crashed into Finn when he suddenly stopped.

Finn was standing in front of a boy who was wearing impossibly tight black jeans and a silky looking black coat with large, pearly white buttons. Around his (pale) neck was the green (was that McQueen?) scarf Finn had been looking for. But what really got him was his face. His incredibly pale, perfect, beautiful face. His complexion was perfect, his eyes were captivating, his lips were re—moving! Oh, crap! He was saying something.

"Uh, yeah." He said slowly while shaking his head 'no'.

Kurt laughed. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, sorry. I was just…distracted." Kurt raised an eyebrow and smirked. Finn looked from Kurt to Blaine, then back to Kurt, and finally to Blaine with a scowl.

"Dude, no. Keep your eyes to yourself. He's just barely 19." There was fire in Finn's

eyes as he glared at Blaine. Literal fire; Blaine could almost feel the heat coming from the

flames. Finn turned back to Kurt. "Is that all your stuff?"

"Yes, oh big brother, it is." Kurt quipped, gesturing to the Burberry luggage and what looked like a black Bottega Veneta (maybe) duffle bag.

"Cool, dude, let's go!" Kurt's cry of 'don't call me dude' was lost as he grabbed two of Kurt's rolling suitcases and scrolled off towards the door, leaving behind Kurt and Blaine. Blaine reached for the duffle bag, but Kurt tried to stop him.

"I can carry my own bags. Finn's just being Finn."

"I know." Blaine flashed once more of his, Finn coined, 'Dazzle 'em' smiles and picked up the bag. "But I want to."

"Ever the gentleman." Kurt smirked. They were silent on the way back to the car. Blaine wanted to say something, but his brain was blank. The awkwardness was probably visible, little beeping 'Awkwards' floating around them. He sighed in relief when they got to the car, where Finn waited impatiently. Blaine pulled the keys out of his pocket and unlocked the trunk, where they put Kurt's luggage, "Carefully!", he demanded. Then they were off.

"So," Blaine began, once they were on the road. "Where are you staying?"

"With Finn."

"Ah, duh!" Blaine nodded and they fell into another awkward silence.

"So Kurt, what are you majoring in?"

"Um, originally fashion design, but that wasn't really working out, so I went out on a crazy limb and chose pre-med. Turned out to be the right thing for me."

"Really?" Blaine asked at the same time Finn said, "That's awesome, dude."

"Yes, Finn, it _is_ awesome. Don't call me dude again."

"Sorry."

"If you're pre-med, why didn't you stay in New York interning instead of coming back to Ohio?" Blaine could feel the air grow tense.

"Some…stuff recently happened and I just thought this would be a nice break. And besides, it was getting kind of lonely being by myself.

They rode for the rest of the ride in silence.

***A Fine Romance***

After what felt like hours they pulled into Finn's driveway. Blaine opened the trunk and all three of them got out of the car, Finn energetically grabbing all three bags and (somehow) managed to get them to the front door without dropping them.

"Well," Blaine chuckled and slammed the trunk closed. "Guess that handles that." He looked at Kurt who had a small smile on his face.

"So Kurt, would you like to…go out for coffee or something tonight?"

Kurt's face immediately dropped. "Listen Blaine, I'm sure you're a nice guy, but I'm not-"

"Oh my god, you're straight, aren't you?" Blaine's eyes widened in horror as the tiny hearts in them broke.

"No!" Kurt hastily yelled. "I'm super gay, like, 100% gay, but-" He hesitated a moment. "I jus went through a really bad break up, and I'm not really looking for a boyfriend."

"That's cool…what about as friends?" He asked hopefully.

"I don't know." Kurt frowned.

"Jut one cup. I know this really great place called Some Cup. They have tea too, if you're into that."

After a couple of moments Kurt smiled. "Okay, but just as friends. Alright?"

"Yeah, I'm _completely_ fine with that. I'll probably drop by around seven tonight, if that's alright."

Kurt nodded. "See you then. Bye Blaine."

Kurt turned and walked into the house and Blaine, smiling dopily, drove off to get Sebastian's liquor. Halway to the liquor store he got a text. When he pulled into the parking lot of the store he pulled out his phone to read the message.

_Can't wait for tonight ;3 xoxo-Nick_

"Fuck!" Blaine screamed. He forgot he had a boyfriend.

***A Fine Romance***

Hey to anyone who happens to be reading this. Well this is my scott Pilgrim/glee crossover Story . It's actually kind of a bit of a crossover with both the movie and the comic. In this story, Blaine is a little less dapper than he usually is. Anyway, I just hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. Thank you.


	2. Chapter 1: Coffee for 1, Please

**Ilvecoffee-n-narutoYouth****: Well, here's the next chapter. I have to say I really enjoyed writing this, especially the fight scene. This is my first time EVER writing a fight scene, so I hope I did well enough. Sorry for any mistakes, I don't have a beta and I don't have time to read over it myself. Hope you enjoy it!**

* * *

Chapter 1: Coffee for 1, Please

Blaine entered his house with a weary sigh. He felt bad for turning down Nick, but Kurt was…Kurt. There was something about the boy that filled him with excitement, whereas he was usually looking at life as if it was a boring novel.

"Sebastian!" Blaine screamed down the hallway. "I got your tequila. You owe me 55 doll- **OH MY **_**GOD**_!" He covered his eyes, accidentally dropping the bottle of tequila on the floor.

"Come on, Blaine. It's nothing you haven't seen before." Sebastian shimmied his bare shoulders and bare everything else, save for a long, black censoring box over his…private area.

"God-how did you even _do _that?" He asked, gesturing towards the censoring box, keeping his eyes averted.

"I'm not quite sure, but I like it." Sebastian thrusted his hips forward a couple of times. "And besides, the clothes are coming off at some point tonight, so why prolong the inevitable?"

"You're _disgusting_ Sebastian." Blaine began to leave towards his room, but Sebastian stopped him by putting a hand on his arm, which Blaine flinched away from.

"What about my liquor?"

"It's on the floor. Do **NOT** touch me until you've washed your hands. I don't know where they've been while I was gone."

Blaine stalked off away from the sound of Sebastian's cackling. It was going to be a long day.

***A Fine Romance***

By the time 6:30 came around Blaine was ready to jump out of his skin. His hair was gelled, he was wearing his favorite pair of red three-quarter length pants with the matching bow-tie, and no socks!

"Sebastian, how do I look?"

"Like a tool." He drawled around a mouthful of chocolate muffin (that he sprinkled with tequila for no reason) and glared at Blaine from their sofa.

"Hey! It's not _my_ fault he didn't show, quit being a jerk. Now seriously, how do I look?"

Sebastian rolled his eyes. "Fine. Now go and let me brood in peace."

With that, Blaine jogged out the house an jumped into his car enthusiastically. He checked his hair in the mirror once more before pulling out. Blaine tried to drive slow enough that he'd get to Kurt's house right at eight, but hallway to Kurt's house he floored it, nearly taking out a black pick up truck and some kids on a bike.

The minute he arrived at Kurt's, he was out the car and speed walking to the door. When he pushed the doorbell, he was immediately greeted to Kurt's grinning face.

Someone's early."

"Well, I'm not the one who threw the door open so…ready to go?"

"Yes, very." As they walked to the car their hands accidentally brushed and Kurt gave him a shy smile, which Blaine returned. He then ran ahead of Kurt and held his door open.

"You know this isn't a date, right?" Kurt asked as he slid into his seat.

"Yeah, I know." Blaine gave Kurt another smile before closing his door and getting into his seat, then driving off.

"So, Kurt began after a few minutes of silence. "Where are we going again?"

"Well, it's this really awesome coffee shop called One Cup. I've got a couple of friends who work there, so I'm there pretty much all the time." He glanced at Kurt from the corner of his eye. "You looked like the coffee kind of guy to me, unless you aren't, then we can go somewhere else." Blaine was internally panicking, not wanting their first official not-date to get off on the wrong foot.

"I love coffee, so calm down." Kurt briefly touched Blaine's arm, and he could have sworn he felt electricity run up it. "Grande non-fat mocha. What about you?"

"I'm more of a medium-drip kind of guy myself."

***A Fine Romance***

The coffee not-date was successful, in Blaine's opinion. He learned that Kurt was considering transferring to a college in Columbus so he could be closer to his family. Also that he was a singer, but he worked as a delivery boy in New York. After they finished their coffee, Blaine and Kurt walked to a bridge that wasn't so far away that overlooked a small pond.

"It's really beautiful out here. "Kurt leaned over the bridge slightly to look down at the water.

"I come up here a lot when I want to think." Blaine sighed. "Listen Kurt, I really, _really_ like you. I now this is soon, but please, just hear me out. You've¾You're special, Kurt. I've never liked anyone or even wanted to _look _at someone as much as you. It's like as soon as I saw you at the airport, there was this…moment where I realized: oh, there you are. I've been looking for you forever."

"Blaine." Kurt had a torn expression on his face. He turned back to look over the water. "Look, you're very sweet, but you and I-this won't work. I'm sorry but¾"

Kurt was interrupted as a dark shadow flew past him, causing him to fall back on his back, and landed in front of Blaine. When it stopped moving he could see it was a brown-haired boy with blue eyes.

"You better step away from me boy, laddie, before I knock your block off!" He screamed at Blaine, who could barely understand him because of the thick Irish accent.

"What did he sa-" Rory threw a quick punch to Blaine's jaw that sent him spiraling to the ground.

"What the hill is wrong with you!" Blaine screamed, rubbing his jaw that ached like hell.

"I told you, you're messing with me man, now I'm going to kill you."

"Kurt, what's going on?" Blaine asked Kurt, who was glaring at Rory with flames in his eyes.

"That's Rory Flanagan, the first of my evil exes."

Blaine's eyes widened, looking from Kurt to Rory, who was bouncing on his heels, getting pumped to fight.

"Evil ex-what are you talking about?"

Kurt was about to say something, but quick as a blink Rory was standing over Blaine. He grabbed him by the shirt collar with one hand and raised him to his eye level.

"I'll show you what he's talking about." And before Blaine could do anything, Rory pulled his fist back and sent it flying into Blaine's face. He went flying over the bridge and smacked into the water beneath it.

"What the _fuck_!" Blaine screamed as his hands moved back and forth from grabbing his nose that hurt like hell, but he didn't think it was broken, to the back of his head that had smacked against an oddly sharp rock. As Blaine was about to pull himself out of the water, Rory jumped onto the bridge's railing, holding something that glinted in the low light. Rory flung it at him and Blaine threw himself to the side, barely missing the four-leaf clover ninja star _thing_ that was imbedded into a rock next to his head.

"What-what the _fuck_!" Blaine screamed again, at a loss for words. Blaine jumped up and, taking a few steps back to steady himself, ran and leaped up, clinging onto the railing. Kurt ran over to him and pulled him up.

"I'm so sorry about this, Blaine. I didn't even know he was still in America. I-" Rory interrupted them by screaming from his place on the railing. As he roared, little green clovers started to float around his head.

"Oh no." Kurt's eyes widened as he looked at Rory's rapidly reddening face. "Duck."

"What?"

"Just duck!" Kurt tackled him to the ground just as the little clovers burst into flames and he blew a large fireball from his mouth right over their heads.

"That's not-that's not human!"

"I know!" Kurt snapped as they rolled to the side quickly to dodge another well aimed fireball. "He's a leprechaun, which I _didn't_ know when we first started dating." Another fireball, which they dodged, but it singed the edge of Blaine's pants leg.

"You can't roll around forever, Blaine Anderson!" His voice sounded significantly deeper as he laughed. It was actually quite disturbing. Rory began to chant again as the clovers reappeared, along with weird words. A meter appeared above Rory's head that was slowly filling with a swirling green.

"Okay, this is what we're going to do." Kurt whispered. "I'm going to distract him, and when I say so, you charge and knock him off the bridge. If all goes as planned, this _should _work…maybe."

"Maybe!" Blaine yelled, perhaps a little too loud because Rory's head snapped towards them. He immediately glared at Blaine. Kurt gave Rory a wave and a flirty smile.

"What are you doing?" Blaine snapped, feeling inappropriately jealous for the situation.

"This is the plan!" Kurt whispered sharply then stood up from where he was crouched and sauntered over to Rory, who hungrily watched Kurt's hips swing, his changing faltering slightly.

"Hi Rory." Kurt's voice was a purr as he slid one of his arms around Rory's waist.

"Err…H-hi Kurt." Rory cleared his throat. The clovers and words began to hover uncertainly in the air and the bar above his head stopped filling.

"You know, Rory," Kurt giggled and ran a finger down Rory's face. "Your accent is especially _sexy_ tonight." Kurt glanced at Blaine, who tensed himself, ready to jump on Rory (though he'd much rather throw him to the ground and pummel that pretty, Irish face).

"So Rory, when are you going to show my your…_lucky charms_?" He waggled an eyebrow. Rory's eyes widened comically as he pulled at the collar of his shirt.

"I, uh-"

"Now Blaine!" Kurt screamed and jumped to the side. Blaine charged at him and punched him as hard in the face as he could, sending him flying over the bridge and into the water beneath it.

"Top o' the morning' to ya…bitch!" Blaine said as he looked over the bridge. Rory gave a bloodcurdling scream before he exploded into a few coins that flew out of the water to Blaine's fet. He picked up the coins and pocketed them, after counting it. About $2. 40.

"Did you really need to add the 'bitch'?" Kurt inquired, walking to stand next to Blaine. "That whole sentence was completely unnecessary, actually."

"It was in the heat of the moment." Blaine pouted, but immediately his face dropped to one of grave seriousness. "Did I just kill someone?"

"No. He'll probably just respawn somewhere in Ireland."

"Oh!" His cheerful demeanor instantly returned. "So…since I pretty much know about all this…stuff can this be a date?"

"Well this would have been a pretty lousy first date." Kurt smirked and Blaine returned it.

"It was pretty fun until we got to the whole 'crazy-Irish-ex-boyfriend' thing, but I'm pretty sure I could make the second date even better."

"Someone's cocky." Kurt laughed, but then his smile dropped. "You know you're going to have to defeat all of them, right?"

"Yeah." Blaine gulped. "I kind of figured that out when you said evil _exes_."

"I might not be there the next time or the time after that to help you out, though. Are you sure you want to do this? I wouldn't blame you if you walked away."

Blaine looked up into Kurt's beautiful blue-grey eyes that were filled with such sadness, and he know then that he'd do anything to make him happy again. Even if it meant a few killings.

"Kurt, I-I'm not saying this is going to be easy." He took his hand and Kurt gave him a small smile. "I'm saying it's going to be worth it, especially if I get you out of it."

Kurt was silent for a while. "That's the nicest thing I've heard in a long time. Thank you, Blaine." Kurt looked as if he wanted to cry when Blaine pulled him into a hug. When they pulled apart, Kurt bit his bottom lip hesitantly, which Blaine thought was adorable, before pressing his lips softly to Blaine's. Kurt then pulled away entirely too soon for his taste.

"Ready to go?" Blaine nodded and took Kurt's hand as they walked off the bridge.

* * *

**Ilvecoffee-n-narutoYouth****: Well that, dear readers is the end of this chapter. I hope you enjoyed it. I have no idea when the next chapter will be because it isn't finished yet. I have like…almost half of it done, I've just been really busy with school work.**


End file.
